The best advice I have been given...

was to have no expectations. Thank you Rebecca Schlieman :) As I am around others with children, I am realizing that part of the reason they are unhappy, disappointed, and frustrated is because they had these expectations of what being a Mom was going to be like. I guess they thought that their children would automatically take long naps, that they wouldn't be exhausted, or irritable, or have feelings of sadness or depression. All I know is that everywhere I turn, I hear negative comments about motherhood. My least favorite terminology is "oh, you just wait". Um, wait for.... the world to end? Something terrible to happen? Don't talk to me like that about having a child. I don't want to hear your negativity. Now, don't get me wrong - I realize that motherhood is not going to be easy. Should I say that again? I realize that motherhood is not going to be easy. It's not like when you get married and go into this honeymoon stage and then wake up realizing marriage isn't easy. I have heard the stories of how tired I am going to be, how awful I will feel. And I am okay with that. I don't expect it to be easy. What I do know is that God tells us

Philippians 2:13-15 (NIV)

13 for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.
14 Do everything without complaining or arguing, 15 so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe

I am pretty sure that He doesn't exclude motherhood from this scripture. I believe that this complaining about motherhood, warning other mothers of "oh, you just wait" and negativity (even if it's subtle) is rampant in our culture. There are going to be trials, it is going to be hard, but that does not exclude us from God's commands. (I also realize some of you are shaking your head like, well she hasn't gone through it yet - and that's fine, but why are you thinking that? and does it negate scripture?)
How are we supposed to shine like stars in the universe when we speak so negatively about this amazing gift from the Lord in our lives?

Psalm 127:3

Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him.

A reward from the Lord. You have been given a reward from the Lord here on earth. What do you do with a reward when you receive it? Just a thought.
I've been to a couple baby showers, and instead of encouraging these women and lifting them up, often they are filled with warnings, and words like "you'll sleep again when they are 18", "you'll get your life back someday", "just wait until they...."
We need to be lifting up and encouraging these mothers, these women of God. To be more like Christ. If we aren't to be conformed to the patterns of this world, then I am going to try my hardest to focus on my children as a reward from the Lord, and not some sort of pain in my rear. I am going to dare to be different. Lord, I pray that there would be a change in our culture of this attitude. That we would be selfless. Dying to ourselves for our children. That we wouldn't want them to take long naps so that we can get done "what we want to get done" or because "we think they should." You know what is best for us and for our children. Help us Lord to seek you. Help me, Lord to make you the priority in my life so that my focus is on you during this time in my life.

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